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50ish gal who views the world with a bit of cynicism. Our world is full of hilarity at every turn, and I feel the need to express my views on it. Others may think it, I say it.


Thursday, June 10, 2010

Family get togethers

Now that summer is upon us, it will surely bring all those family weddings, reunions, BBQ's and other assorted reasons for families to get together. For some people, the mere thought of this is a reason to binge drink.

The wedding of some obscure relative is always great. I don't understand the need to send out invitations to all relatives, especially when you would never dream of socializing with them at any other time. There is always some real or imagined family feud going on and what better setting than your wedding to hash it out? Drinks are mandatory for this wedding game. There is the relative who loves to dance and, with not one shred of rhythym in their whole body, is tearing up the dance floor. There is the alcoholic relative who usually pukes and passes out. They are assigned a "babysitter" for the occasion and if the babysitter is smart, they will make sure they pass out early. Elope to Vegas, it'll be more fun.

The family reunion is a fun event too. A family commitee is appointed to contact everyone, send out invites, coordinate food, etc. The head of this commitee is the most type A gal in the family. On the appointed day, she will show up dressed in a pink and green outfit, with all the matching accessories. Her kids will be coordinated and hubby will be wearng a pink shirt as well. Despite the facade, she is living on the ragged edge of stress. The appointed BBQ ers will be arguing over the best method for cooking the meat. This is also an occasion to hash out the family feud and again, it's a drinking game. You see family member you barely remember and have nothing in commom with. Thankfully, these events take place only once every ten years.

Summer BBQ's always add a much needed diversion from the boredom of summer. Let'a all get together during a heatwave and cook food over an open fire. Thank god there's alot of cold beer to start drinking at ten in the morning. A shot or six of booze in between beers and you are good to go. Usually one of the kids get stung by a bee, falls down and crack their head open or beats the crap out of one of their cousins. We all have these great memories. It also give all the women in the family an opportunity to gossip about other family members. You can always tell they are talking about you if, when you look over at them, they all smile and wave.

We can look at these events in a couple of diffrent ways. They can be a total drag or, a great source of entertaiment. We already know what to expect since we tend to repeat certain behaviors once we are with our families. And, admit it, some are just downright entertaining. The drunken uncle who insists he can hit the softball further that anyone else. He almost made the majors you know. At least one women will be inappropriately dressed. A string bikini after fifty is not a good look no matter what, but hey, you go girl. The best thing to be at any of these types of get togethers is a guest. No relation to this family whatsoever. You just might say to youself, "WOW, my family looks pretty good".

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